“Sometimes I can’t figure designers out. It’s as if they flunked human anatomy.”
― Erma Bombeck
“I can see your underpants through your dress.” my husband stated nonchalantly as I stood in front of the mirror readying myself for guests before our dinner party on Saturday night. “I’m aware,” I replied, “but I’m wondering if that’s okay since I’m wearing a matching set.” Clearly befuddled yet knowing much better than to question my sartorial judgment he simply replied: “Well, regardless, I just wanted to make sure that you were aware.” His confusion was understandable. I was equally perplexed, though I was pondering an entirely different quandary. Is sheer still in this spring? I had to run across the street to the grocery store and pick up some more antipasto and couldn’t chance my outfit landing me on our neighborhood’s worst dressed list again. There was an unfortunate incident that happened last week involving a slit-up-to-there maxi skirt, a runaway dog and a children’s soccer game that I’m still trying to live down. I’m assuming Angelina Jolie didn’t have to run in THAT DRESS.
Source:huffingtonpost.com
As for the outfit at hand, I decided that my style jury (namely the teenagers bagging my groceries) cast their hit vs. miss votes based on how transparent it was that my outfit was, well, transparent. All credibility would be lost if while attempting to appear abreast with what is au courant in the world of fashion I ended up looking like the girl unaware that the world can see her skivvies. Wavering as to whether I could convincingly pull of the look, and also starting to falter on my choice of undergarments (should I have gone with a boy short?), I struggled to think of the last time I had seen someone I knew pull off something similar with any success. I couldn’t, so I decided to put on a slip and pass on the whole peekaboo look. When I actually gave it some thought, I realized that in real life you just don’t see people going about their day-to-day activities in their underwear. The fashion magazines I have been buying, the runway reports that I’ve been reading on the internet and my twitter account, the catalogs that come in the mail, they all tell me that see-through materials are hot for the spring. So where are all your panties ladies?? I don’t see any on the streets of Vancouver. Have I been duped? Or could my deepest fear be true? Real life is not a runway.
The sheer trend S/S 2013
Source:www.swide.com. They first started a couple of years ago while shopping at Victoria’s secret
Perhaps I should have known all along, and truth be told, I’ve had my suspicions for a while. And the problem isn’t just that real women don’t look like models, though it would be nice if Gisele would get even a tad bit of cellulite, just to even out the universe. No, the crux of the issue really boils down to things like this:
Blake Lively in 2009 at the screening of The Lives of Pippa Lee (a movie I presume?)
By the way, the caption of the article that I took this photo from reads “Are Blake Lively’s shorts inappropriate?” I myself am not sure yet. I haven’t gotten past her breasts spilling out of her blazer which she is wearing WITHOUT ANYTHING UNDERNEATH IT. I have several blazers. I wear them to work. Save perhaps for my short stint at Hooters during university, I have a feeling that the above look would not have served me well in terms of career advancement. Also I feel a person would get cold in an outfit like this. Another popular look this season that is not offering a lot of coverage is the midriff trend:
Louis Vuitton Spring 2013
While a great idea on paper (on 2 dimensional waifish models), this is likely not the most functional or comfortable fad for the average woman. I bought a ‘crop top’ last summer and have yet to wear it. I’m just waiting for the right occasion. It has to be a casual enough affair that I can wear such a shirt. And also one where I don’t have to sit down, twist, bend over, eat, drink or take any deep breaths so that my stomach will appear as flat as possible. An event where I can lie down would be preferable. Come to think of it, my funeral would be ideal. (Take note family;Have the embalmer remove all excess fluid, I must not appear bloated in this shirt.) Cut-out clothing is another runway to real-way potential disaster. There are too many holes for your lady bits to pop out of.
Roberto Cavalli Spring 2013
Each season, the runway is full of looks that appear magical on the gazelles prancing down the stage, yet on the city streets would look far more stupid than stupendous. Adaptations of these looks trickle down to the masses and become the season’s trends, the looks that everyone covets for a time and then dismisses when something new and fresh comes along. It’s a banal and rigorous cycle, and one that I find myself more and more unable and unwilling to keep up with as I get older and older. I find that I have begun to appreciate comfort as opposed to just style. I care more about quality, even if it comes at the expense of quantity. I have started to pay attention to my body when I dress. I have always appreciated fashion as an art and for it’s ability to be used as a tool for self-expression, however recently I have found that my penchant for oddly unique and usually impractical wardrobe items has subsided. I still hold on to my “fun” clothes for nostalgia, often looking at them wistfully, but find myself wearing my practical clothing more often. After all, who wears thigh-high Stella McCartney boots to a pub? Or a crochet class? I don’t have the same life that I had when I was 25. I don’t need the same wardrobe. I guess what I’m saying is that I’m hanging up the clear clothing for good. And I must say that it’s a relief. It’s exhausting trying to match your underwear to your outerwear.
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